I have been good. Have been keeping close to God..and I am so blessed. Everything in my life is so full of His grace: waking up early, keeping the room, beginning to cook, traveling around, prayer meeting...I feel God reaching out to embrace me and the moment that I am in. I am a slave to no-one, but a servant of righteousness. And I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It is the power of God working in those who believe. May I be a food for Christ my Lord, so that good can triumph over evil in the end. May the allures of this present life and the thirst for physical comfort be silenced within my soul. I am sitting before Christ right in my room this Thursday afternoon, contemplating how the universe pales in comparison with my holy Lord.
The vision trip which Den is in has set me thinking and praying much. And I thank God that it should be this way. It has brought us so much closer to each other...though I want so much more to feel his struggles, to soothe his sorrows, to lighten his load. There is this prayer for divine intervention which I keep praying, but even then I know the answer lies elsewhere, within reach...(of our feeble arms). I am silenced sometimes, by the seeming absence of God and the seeming greatness of indifference, both within and around! But somehow the silence is leading me to a place of absolute trust, a place where one can do nothing but willingly surrender in awe and gratitude. I found so many things displeasing within my own soul but praise be to the Holy God that I am no longer trying to set things right. I am surrendering. It was difficult at first. It is much easier now.
What I have for Den isnt just a feeling. I know when it is one. I have for him a calling from God, something much higher than both of us combined. I am growing surer and surer by the days, that God has a great plan going for us. Something extra-ordinary! Very extra-ordinary! May the Lord count me worthy of this holy calling, and grant me the love and humility I will need to walk this path in obedience.
'Anna, whose heart are you wearing', said Pastor See last Sunday in church. I thank my Lord that I could say without being ashamed that it was someone's heart---very fragile yet very strong all at once. I am proud of it. Will always be.
But this isnt really meant for him to read...because I would have told him all this already. It is written instead for you, the one facing this screen: so that you can see and witness that the Lord is the father of the heavenly light, the giver of every good and perfect gift! May your heart be blessed today and may all your thoughts gravitate towards the author of life---in whom we live and move and have our beings!
Blessed afternoon!
Anna